Christmas was a time of great gluttony. I ate cheese with reckless abandon. I drunk alcohol before 11am and was proud of it. I showed people my swollen stomach .. and instead of scolding me people congratulated me on a good Christmas!
Christmas is one of the few times of the year where it is okay, in fact actively encouraged, for people to over eat. Easter is another one – you can have chocolate smeared all round your face at 8.30am and it’s totally fine to be eyeing up which egg is next. I love and hate these times of year. I love December because is the only time of year when I don’t have to hide my food obsession and people are happy to discuss what they’ve eaten with me. EVERYONE is discussing food. People are considering the Christmas Party menu (I love menus, if someone is going out to eat I will google the restaurant and decide what I would have. I am aware I’m not invited but this won’t stop me making my menu choices), the supermarket adverts are showing you sexy close ups of moist Christmas puddings, heat shimmering just above their sticky sweet surface, what meat you prefer becomes a legitimate choice of conversation at the water cooler. At Christmas it is like mini Sarahs are spawned everywhere and everyone is constantly thinking, dreaming and drooling about food. But then comes January. And this is why my feelings towards Christmas turn to hate because in January everyone becomes food Nazis. The tv, once a food haven, is now full of adverts for weightwatchers and fat fighting programmes. Food is now a dirty word. People shun the biscuit tin, they eat pointless food like celery, they turn their nose up at a mince pie. Have you all forgotten how much fun you had over Christmas? Wasn’t it nice to list to each other all the cheese you had eaten in one sitting? In January I lose all my food allies. When I try and bring up menus people tell me to be quiet, don’t you know that stuff is bad for you? People even frown upon cream teas. (I had a cream tea last week and someone said to me “So soon after Christmas!?). So Christmas, we have a love hate relationship. You bring me December and with it you bring me like minded friends but then you whip me with food hating January and make me feel like an isolated freak.